Mitchell Report Conspiracy Theories?

You knew this would happen. The conspiracy theorists are now having their say, and a few have taken their cases to the New York papers. 

I've now read where some Yankee fans think that the Mitchell Report is somehow "invalid" because there are no names of any "major" Red Sox stars in it. (I guess Eric Gagne and Brendan Donnelly don't qualify under "major.") And they seem to think that George Mitchell, because of his ties to the Sox, probably overlooked or covered up any big name Red Sox players who may have been juicers.

What rubbish.

Let's face facts. Mitchell and his investigators got lucky, as they found Kirk Radomski and Brian McNamee for their report, and both were based in New York. (So you figure that most of the major names they have would be New York-based players.) If they didn't have either man, the report would not have been very substantial. The commission had no subpoena power, and very few people would cooperate with them.

Let's say they also found a clubhouse guy or some other steroid pusher with connections to the Red Sox, and they named some big Boston names. If Mitchell had "buried" that evidence, don't you think that the guys who were interviewed by Mitchell would somehow let the Boston papers know that Mitchell excluded that evidence? You know someone like Dan Shaughnessy would LOVE something "juicy" (pardon the pun) like that. And besides, George Mitchell is man of impeccable character that he wouldn't risk tarnishing his lifelong public service by leaving out vital evidence like that if he had it in his possession.

Even a blowhard like Yankee shill Mike Francesa doesn't believe in any conspiracy theories around the report. Can there be juicers on the Red Sox who weren't named in the report? Of course there can be. The Mitchell Report is just the tip of the iceberg as far as the steroid investigations into baseball goes. If there is evidence against any Boston player, it should come to light. It's just that these nonsensical theories about how Mitchell is covering up because of his Red Sox connection is so blatantly absurd. 

But of course, consider who these ludicrous theories are coming from: brain-dead Yankee fans.

With Andy Pettitte's admission he took HGH in 2002, he just made Roger Clemens' life all the more miserable. So are we now to believe that McNamee got steroids for Pettitte but not Clemens? As I said before, if Clemens is indeed clean, he has to start filing lawsuits  for slander. Otherwise, he's wasting his time. His life becomes an open book if he files suit. 

I also read a really hilarious column in today's New York Post about some guy named Baichu, who was another of Clemens' flunkies, and worked with him as his massage therapist in Houston from 2004-06. Baichu basically called McNamee a troubled man who was also an alcoholic and was jealous that Clemens let him go when he returned to Houston and won another Cy Young Award, so McNamee "made up" all that stuff up about him. Baichu said that Clemens was "only guilty of having a big heart."

It made me want to reach for my vomit bag.

Clemens only has one recourse now that Pettitte has come clean. Disappear the way Rafael Palmiero did after he got caught in 2005.

I hope he does us all that favor.